If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize