but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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