this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
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