Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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