Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Randomize
