Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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