so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
