I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Are we still banned from the library?
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future