Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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