she was so not down for the gang bang
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
We don't watch enough power rangers
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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