we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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