What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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