FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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