I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
