Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
You ate ashes out of my bong
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
