I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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