i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
