I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
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