Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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