I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Randomize
