Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Randomize
