It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
where am i from again
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
