OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Dick very happy bro
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
