Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
