dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Randomize
