"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
