I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Randomize
