I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
