She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
