Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
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I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
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T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
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