NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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