Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
