their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
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