i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize