Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
that's an acceptable place to lick
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
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