Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
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I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
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So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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