hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
