If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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