She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
