i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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