I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
