I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
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