Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
