Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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