he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
