he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
