Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize