I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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