nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
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i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
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Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
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