i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
