Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
